diary.

1.3.26

we're starting fresh.

2025 was a great year and also a very very tough year. i moved into a new place and my whole life shifted. i think i thought everything would be rainbows and butterflies after moving but if im honest, a bunch of things did not go as planned. the consensus i have come to is that i cannot continue to run a full production myself. either i have to scale back and do less production work or i have to hire help. i truly don't know which route to take but i hope i find some clarity soon. my mental health has been in a downward spiral lately and i know it is because i am not spending my time on the things i love. i just want to make and explore and delve into subjects i haven't even scratched the surface of but there is always that nagging need to cover bills and production has always been my primary income. i have many ideas to try and so much desire to share them with the world but i feel stuck a lot of the time. i want this diary to be more honest this year so im just going to lay it all out there from now on. good or bad this is life and i still have a lot to learn. hope you guys have a good start to your year. wishing you love. xx -C

1.26.26

struggling through it. life is knocking me down again and again and the state of this world is really not helping. im trying really damn hard to keep myself busy. still making art in trying times is so so important. i haven't quite figured much more out but i hope i have the strength to keep going and growing. i tell myself often that hard times are just as important as happy times and everything is a lesson. i think i need to block out more of the noise and just hard focus on the things inspiring me still. wishing you all well, anonymous internet friends. xx -C

2.17.26

feeling like i may be getting back to myself. the ideas are flowing and i am very confident in my plans. i just need that final push to get my body and mind to fully embrace the life and work ethic needed to fulfill the plans. i find myself going back and forth on a lot of things lately. i could do this, or i could do that. i think i just need to do it all. or at the very least i need to try it all and find out for myself what works. this all just sounds like ramblings of a madman but i feel like im onto something. more soon. xx -C